Young Adult Cancer Canada > Community > Profiles > Elizabeth Bonnie

Elizabeth Bonnie

Age at Diagnosis: 22

Current Age (at time of profile): 24

Hometown
Palm Bay, FL (USA)

How did you find out you were sick? What events led to the diagnosis?
I started developing flu-like symptoms a few months before my diagnosis, but I didn’t really think much of it because I was a full time student and worked 40 hours a week. I just thought that my body was getting tired. Then I started developing odd symptoms (bleeding gums, heavier than normal periods, extreme exhaustion, tiny red marks all over my body, etc). The thing that finally did it for me was the enormous bruises that I developed for no reason. I had one on my upper back and hip bone. They looked like someone took a baseball and thrown it at me. They were black and swollen. I called my dad (who is an RN nurse) and told him about them. He told me to go to the ER and get blood taken.

I went to the ER at 4pm and had blood taken. Around 8pm, the doctor came back in and told me that I had no blood counts (no reds, whites or platelets) and told me straight up that he believes I have leukemia and that he was sending an oncologist in to talk with me. I was transferred to another local hospital to be placed in isolation. The next day, I was checked out and I packed what I could bring on a plane. I flew home to FL that night and was taken to my hometown hospital. At first, I was told that I had Aplastic Anemia and that they didn’t specialize in that, so I was transferred to Shands Hospital in Gainesville, FL. Two days later, I was diagnosed with APL.

What year was it? What was your age at the time?
I was diagnosed on September 5, 2005. I was 22.

At what level of education were you at diagnosis?
I was in my final year of college.

Do you work? Assistant Manager at Chick-fil-A for the past 8 years.

What was your diagnosis?
Acute Promyelocytic Leukemia, subtype 3 of AML.

What are your career goals?
I want to finish up my degree and become a Child Life Specialist, working mainly with cancer patients and their families. I also want to work with young adults with cancer, maybe start my own non-profit organization.

What were your first thoughts when diagnosed?
For the first week or so, I didn’t really “think” about it. It was such a blur of activity that first week; I barely had time to breathe. When it finally sunk in that I had cancer I was scared, probably the most scared I’ve ever been my whole life. I watched my little brother deal with brain cancer for almost 10 years and I didn’t know what to expect.

How did your family react?
My family was just in shock that ANOTHER child was diagnosed with cancer. It was more “this AGAIN?” than anything else. But they were great. My brothers called me everyday and talked with me, and so did a lot of other family members. A bunch of them came up to see me and check on me. My little brother was probably the best though, because he had been through the same thing as I was going through and he truly understood what I was feeling at the time. I really relied on him a lot during that process.

How did your friends react?
I have to say, my friends handled it the best they could. They were shocked, of course, and I did lose some “friends” during the whole process. But the ones that stuck by me would just call and check on me and didn’t treat me any different than before. They would keep me updated on all the “gossip” and let me chat about different things, and when I wanted to talk about the cancer, they would listen. That’s all I needed and they were amazing about it.

What did your treatment consist of?

Medical Side: I was given 4 rounds of intense chemotherapy. The first round was given to me in-patient and I stayed in the hospital for 31 days. Then I was cleared to go home, where I was monitored by a local oncologist. Then my last 3 rounds were all out-patient, through Shands. I was hospitalized 3 different times for various infections that I got while on chemo.

Non-Medical Side: My little brother once told me that chemo is basically Drain-O and your body was going to hate you. Nothing could prepare me for what I was going to face. I’m an extremely independent person, always have and always will be, and to have someone have to take care of me and basically do things for me (such as shower and walk) was the hardest for me. I was so weak that I couldn’t stand in the shower and I had to get a shower chair. I remember crying in the shower because I was so embarrassed over that.

Another big symptom I dealt with was weight GAIN. I gained almost 100lbs in 8 months. My doctors told me that the chemo had completely changed my body chemistry, so my metabolism was shot. It didn’t help the fact that I had to deal with weight problems along with everything else. I think that was the biggest blow for me, because I never had ANY weight problems before and now to deal with it, along with the fact that you don’t feel your best anyway during chemo was a hard thing, definitely. Because of all that, I fell into depression and developed social anxiety disorder. I have also developed polycystic ovarian syndrome and there is a chance that I may never carry my own children in the future.

In which hospital(s) were you treated?
Shands Hospital in Gainesville, FL.

What is your current medical status?
I am now in my 18th month of being in remission. I have 6 more months of my maintenance chemo and then I’m done for good!

How is life different for you now post diagnosis (physically, emotionally, socially, spiritually)?
Life has definitely changed for me since my cancer diagnosis. Before I was diagnosed, I always felt like I was in a rush. I had to hurry up and finish school, get married, have children, start a career. I never had time to just enjoy my life. Cancer has made me more laid back than I was before and I now enjoy life instead of just getting by.

But my faith has taken the biggest hit. I was angry at God for so many years that I just shut down and let that relationship fall apart. Today, things are okay. I’m still dealing with my own anger towards that, but that’s the greatest part of it all, He’ll still be there when I finally let go.

What is/was the toughest part of your challenge?
Probably the emotional part was the hardest for me. Not only did I have to deal with a cancer diagnosis, I also had to cope with the loss of my relationship (my boyfriend “wanted a break” 5 days before I was diagnosed; we got back together for a bit, then he broke it off 3 months later) and the loss of my grandfather.

I never had time to “grieve” for anything really. I just had to “deal”. Then I had to deal with people around me, constantly telling me that I should “be thankful I was still alive” and “to look on the bright side”. To a cancer patient, those are the worst words you could say to them. I couldn’t be myself; I couldn’t express what I was feeling. I had to fake my emotions constantly. I internalized everything and that developed into problems of their own.

Then I had to deal with my own doctors not wanting to treat me with respect and accusing me of being a pain killer addict “because of my age”. It was just one thing after another it seemed.

What is/was the best part of your challenge?
The best part of it all was the people I met and got to know through it all. I became friends with people I never thought I would be friends with. I reconnected with old friends that I had lost contact with along the way, and (this is going to sound horrible) I got rid of people that I didn’t need in my life. I now surround myself with positive people and I know that I can count on the people I have around. Cancer has been a blessing in that aspect.

What really motivated you to keep going while you were sick?
Knowing that there are others out there, going through the same thing I am, and knowing that through my experiences, someone might find hope in them and realize that they are not the only ones.

What lessons or messages have you taken away from your experience?
I have learned that if you want to smash your goals on the rocky shoals of intention, simply tell God your plans. Cancer is not what I am, it's what happened to me; just a footnote in this story of life. I know that no matter what happens to me for the rest of my life, I know that if I can get through cancer, I can get through just about anything.

What are your thoughts and feelings about your illness now? How have they changed since before your diagnosis?
Cancer used to scare me and, to some degree, it still does. But I’m not terrified of it anymore. It doesn’t have the control over my life that it once had. I’m proud to be a cancer survivor and I’m proud of what I’ve been through. Now I’m more determined to help others through their own situations and, hopefully, I can make a difference in another person’s life.

What are some (if there are any you know of) preventative measures that people can take to lower their risk of having an experience like yours?
Just be aware of what your body is telling you. If anything seems odd or abnormal, go see a doctor. Don’t wait until it's too late.

Did you attend any support groups during your challenge?
No.

If you did not attend a support group, why?
There were none available in my area.

I might have attended one if there was one available. It may have helped to see that I wasn't alone in my sickness.

How are you connected with Young Adult Cancer?
I found them [RTC] on Facebook.

What they are doing is amazing. I think that having this community can only be positive.

If you are interested in connecting with Elizabeth Bonnie please email connect@youngadultcancer.ca.