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Summer, 2002: How Am I?

A very good question, that many of you have asked, both in person and in my inbox, in the past many days. It is a question that I get asked every day by new people I connect with, and yet it has been brought to my attention by some of you that in the past many weeks I have not been telling you “how I am”. So that is exactly what I’ll do now…

The categories of that question are intellectual, emotional, physical and spiritual, but I will also say that generally I am feeling great. Far better than expected, we are 2 days short of my 10 month mark Post-Transplant (October 10, 2001), and I am feeling better than I expected, physically especially. I am still a little like a school girl, my strength and stamina are way down and I need to rebuild, which is a Challenge I know well, and will tackle the way I do all my Challenges – one step at a time, with the love and support of my family and friends, and with as much Positive Attitude as I have in me.

The categories…

Intellectual health – Being in a position to work, which is really like play for me, is a great blessing as I love what I do, and being able to get back out and connect with people, plan and continue the process of bringing my dreams and ideas to the reality phase, is something that I love and am so happy to be back doing at a high level. And as with the other three areas of my health, and life really, the intellectual/mental side of things that relates to my work carries over to other areas of my life. Away from work I have also been doing a lot of thinking lately, some related to RealTime Cancer, some not, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about awareness, and I am brewing some pretty fun discoveries I feel. Of course I’ll share when they become “communicateable”.

Emotional health – This I feel is a work in progress, as are all areas, but this one in particular is in need of some work from me right now. I put the social health in this category, and I have really been enjoying resuming some of my social activities in the past few months, as they have been off my list for about a year and I have missed them big-time. I love to get out, connect with friends and new people and when I go through a period where that process is dramatically altered, it is a Challenge for me. I have had a ton of conversations about the timing of my Cancer Challenges, specifically the fact that I got sick right after I left University, thus my social structure was gone, so when I was healthy there was no place for me to officially “return”, I had to create one of my own. I work by myself, I had been out of the loop for an extended period of time, and life doesn’t stop for those around you, so I had to re-orient myself with my social world, or recreate it really. That is something I am having to do again, and it is a Challenge.

Physical health – I’m down over 45 pounds from my Pre-Cancer form, and for some reason in the past few weeks I’ve actually lost another 7-8 pounds, which I am planning to put back on soon. But while my strength is predictably low, my general feeling and pain level is also very low, which is a bonus. This time out I have had much less consistent daily pain, with the exception of my recent liver and side pains, I have had very little pain in the past 6 months which is quite a blessing. I am continuing to slowly drop the Prednisone, and with that may very possibly come pain, but we’ll deal with that as it comes. I am also gearing myself up for a serious rebuilding effort… I drove by a soccer pitch the other night and it has really got me thinking about next year. I am also planning to kick my training in for this year’s Climb on Signal Hill, more about that later. We’ll see how those things go, but today I’m feeling great, great after a very active and social past week.

Spiritual health – This is perhaps my favourite part of my health, and the one where all the other’s really get tied in from my perspective. As I mentioned above a lot of my thinking, the awareness related thinking, has been outside the realm of my work, and much of that relates to my spirit and me paying attention to it. I do have this desire/need inside to think about my life and life in general, and to form my own opinions about what I think is happening here. I have been doing that lately, and it is a process that I love. A couple of years ago I went through this very creative period where I really let my mind run, and I’m feeling like I’m about to do the same now and over the next while. It’s all very good, and something I love.

Hope that gives you a good perspective on where I am, and how I am. I am really feeling well, you know the prognosis from here on out is anyone’s guess, depends who you talk to, some say 40% for 5 years of Remission, others say first Remission is often the longest, which would be about 2 ½ years. The truth is that I know I’m here now, today, so I have decided to make today great, and it has been. If I’m fortunate enough to get tomorrow then I’ll make the effort to make that the best day ever.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, no news is good news, when I’m sick or Challenged you can be sure I’ll be in your inbox, after calling my parents you are the next place I go. Take care of you and I’ll be back again soon.

 

Always…
Live Life.  Love Life.

Geoff

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