A lack of patience, some frustration, a desire to shake things up a little and an active mind all point to one conclusion… I’m feeling well! I can feel myself get the grit inside, I can feel my ambition begin to stir, I can feel my mind start roaming back to that field of activity I call “work” that I make an effort to stay away from, simply it is a feeling of wanting to get active again. This feeling was a big Challenge for me during my Original Series, and I have committed myself to working through it for the rest of my life. I like to be active, and that doesn’t always mean in motion, but active, I like to be putting effort into one or many of my ideas and projects and when you are sick that is most often not an option. I like to be focusing my energy on making an impact, and when my desired method of making an impact starts to switch to bigger projects, when that switch inside my mind happens I know that I’m feeling well.
I have no trouble relaxing, more to the point I love it, but I have limit of how much down time I can tolerate without some internal struggle. Directly influencing that amount of time is my general level of feeling, how well I’m feeling. When I am sick I don’t much care about anything except my own comfort. That may sound selfish, but it is largely true. I usually focus on getting as comfortable as I can, as I’m most often in the hospital or definitely in bed at home, and I sleep. That’s what I do when I’m really sick. But as I begin to feel better things change, and when I really begin to feel well one of the first things to change is my mind and that desire to be more active physically and mentally, becomes more prominent. That’s where I am.
I spend much of my day on my couch, whether it’s writing and reading emails, watching tv, reading, relaxing listening to music, whatever, I spend much of my day in the same place and as my energy and well-being have improved I can’t stand to be here anymore. So it is time to change.
A part of me was hoping that GVH would start and following that would be the steroids, which will play with my mind and body. But that hasn’t happened just yet and that lack of patience and ambition I mentioned earlier continues to grow so I figure I should alter my set-up at home a little and create an environment that is more conducive to my state of mind. I have started to think a lot about the Coins for Cancer Drive that we did last March, and that I want to do again this March and I would be lying if I said
I haven’t been thinking a lot about getting back to high schools to interact with and share my experience with students. This school year we were committed to delivering the second RealTime Cancer Challenge in 11 high schools across Newfoundland and they have definitely been on my mind as the Challenge would have launched about a month ago.
While these signs can be frustrating for me I get very encouraged by them because I know they really do mean that I’m feeling well, far better than I thought I would at this point. I’ll let you know how the changes flow and you can count on me being back again soon. Have a good one.
Always…
Live Life. Love Life.
Geoff
