I believe that Challenges come in two major categories, the unexpected, and the personally selected. The unexpected ones are just that, unexpected, they are the Challenges that arrive when you least expect them, they hit from behind and catch you completely by surprise. Cancer, or most any health Challenge is a good example, but there are many others. The personally selected ones on the other hand, they are Challenges you go after, things you choose to tackle, like getting a degree.
I am no different than anyone as I’ve had my share of both types of Challenges, and while I feel I’ve been a little more reactionary in the past 3 1/2 years since the arrival of my first Cancer Challenge, I have also managed to keep the personal selection of Challenges going too.
Often times the unexpected Challenges that come into our lives are referred to as “traumas” or “disasters”, and I can see why as they can appear that way initially for sure. But I believe that there are also opportunities, and it is within each of us to see the opportunities contained within our Challenges. I’m not suggesting that we ignore some of the negative things that come with our Challenges, as often times they can be quite significant. What I am suggesting is that we not focus on them completely, all the time.
I can tell you that when I was originally diagnosed from some perspectives it was the worst thing that could have happened. I was 22, just graduated from university, tackling the Challenge of building a business, loving my independence and living on my own, “I had my whole life ahead of me” many would say. “Having such a terrible experience at such a young age, it’s not fair”.
Consider it this way… I was 22, thus I was young, healthy and strong, which was a major Positive considering the treatment and Challenges I went through. I had just graduated from university, and had I not opted out of the Business co-op program I wouldn’t have been scheduled to graduate until May 1999, which obviously wouldn’t have happened given I was diagnosed in Nov 1998. I, and only I, was tackling the Challenge of building my business, I had no one relying on me, no employees, no major debts to pay. And I was loving my independence, and living on my own, but it was me, no family to support or provide for, just me. Complement those factors with awesome support from my loving parents and family, friends and an amazing email group, many members are still with me today. My Leukemia came at a good time in many respects.
So I tackle that Challenge, about 18 months of my life was pretty focused on my first Cancer Challenge. I work myself to a point where I can begin to tackle some more of those personally selected Challenges. First on my list is the establishment and development of RealTime Cancer, then I want to recreate my original Cancer Challenge for new audiences, then I want to build on our initial success and take RealTime Cancer operations across the province… but this is where I came across another major unexpected Challenge.
A relapse, the worst possible news, a return of my Leukemia, something that was never far from my mind, but also not something I lived as if it was going to return tomorrow. But it did return, another disaster? I was well into the planning stages of delivering the RealTime Cancer Challenge in 12-15 high schools across the province, growing our influence and presence and taking my commitment to share my experience to a new level. But those plans would need to be altered, so I altered them. Instead of returning to high schools as planned, I opened my experience up to the community and here we are 7 months later.
My major unexpected Challenges of the past 3 and half years have brought the possibility of me dying right in front of me. When I was first diagnosed it was something that I worked on accepting, as the reality of my situation is never something I have wanted to ignore. However I will say that after relapsing I do view things a little differently, or perhaps it is more that I’m not sure how to view things. First time out the Docs suggested that I had a 70% chance of hitting the 5 year mark, this time they figure it’s about 40%. It also seems that for most Patients your first remission is your longest, my first remission was about 2 1/2 years. But statistics are representative of a whole group, and as one Doc I spoke with said “it works, or it doesn’t, it’s 100%, or 0%”.
What role the statistics are playing with my mindset I don’t know, I know I don’t like to ignore them, or to totally focus on them. As I move back into a state where I am prepared to tackle more personally selected Challenges, the Coins Drive being a major one, and my physical rebuilding will also be near the top of that list, I am continuing to struggle with my approach to the rest of my life.
I find it funny that I describe my mindset and feelings this way “my approach to the rest of my life”, but that is really how I view it. I am in the rest of my life right now, and while I know how to approach tomorrow, and the day after, the day after that may be a bit of a mystery. And for a mind like mine that is not something I’m used to. I’ve mentioned this a couple of times now, and I’m sure I’ll continue to mention it as it is a Challenge that is in front of me now and while I’ve spent some time with it, I don’t feel I’m making much in the way of progress. As I do you can count on hearing about it.
Always…
Live Life. Love Life.
Geoff
